Hello, Hello.
My names Terry
and I'm a law abider
There's nothing I like more
than getting fired up on beer
And when the weekends here I to exercise
my right to get paralytic and fight
Good bloke fairly
But I get well leery when geezers
look at me funny
Bounce 'em round like bunnies
I'm likely to cause mischief
Good clean grief you must
believe and I ain't no thief.
Law abiding and all, all legal.
And who cares about my liver
when it feels good
What you need is some real manhood.
Rasher Rasher Barney and Kasha
putting peoples backs up.
Public disorder,
I'll give you public disorder.
I down eight pints and run
all over the place
Spit in the face of an officer
See if that bothers you cause
I never broke a law in my life
Someday I'm gonna settle
down with a wife
Come on lads lets have
another fight
Eh hello. My names Tim and I'm a criminal,
In the eyes of society I need
to be in jail
For the choice of herbs I inhale.
This ain't no wholesale operation
Just a few eighths and some
Playstations my's vocation
I pose a threat to the nation
And down the station the police
hold no patients
Let's talk space and time
I like to get deep sometimes
and think about Einstein
And Carl Young And old Kung
Fu movies I like to see
Pass the hydrator please
Yeah I'm floating on thin air.
Going to Amsterdam in the New
Year - top gear there
'Cause I taker pride in my hobby
Home made bongs using my
engineering degree
Dear Leaders, please legalize
weed for these reasons.
Like I was saying to him. I told
him: "Top with me and
you won't leave."
So I smacked him in the head
and downed another Carling
Bada Bada Bing for the lad's night.
Mad fight, his face's a sad sight.
Vodka and Snake Bite.
Going on like a right geez,
he's a twat,
Shouldn't have looked at me like that.
Anyway I'm an upstanding citizen
If a war came along I'd
be on the front line with em.
Can't stand crime either them
hooligans on heroin.
Drugs and criminals those thugs on the penny
colored will be the downfall of society
I've got all the anger pent
up inside of me.
You know I don't
see why
I should be the criminal
How can something with
no recorded fatalities be illegal
And how many deaths are there
per year from alcohol
I just completed Gran Tourismo on
the hardest setting
We pose no threat on my settee
Ooh the pizza's here will someone
let him in please
"We didn't order chicken,
Not a problem we'll pick it out
I doubt they meant to mess us about
After all we're all adults not louts."
As I was saying,
we're friendly peaceful people
We're not the ones out there
causing trouble.
We just sit in this hazy bubble
with our quarters
Discussing how beautiful Gail Porter is.
MTV, BBC Two, Channel Four is on
until six in the morning.
Then at six in the morning the sun
dawns and it's my bedtime.
Causing trouble, your stinking rabble
Boys saying I'm the lad who's spoiling it
You're on drugs it really bugs me
when people try and tell me I'm a thug
Just for getting drunk
I like getting drunk
'Cause I'm an upstanding citizen
If a war came along I'd be
on the front line with 'em.
Now Terry
Err, well actually according
to research
Government funding for further education
pales in insignificance
When compared to how much
they spend on re pairing
Leery drunk people at the weekend
In casualty wards all over the land.
The Streets 
